Reason #5: Their Assumptions Are Fallacious.
Many times, we make assumptions about people that are simply fallacious. These assumptions might seem to be true, but until we make the necessary finding or ask questions, we should never come to a conclusion about those offending us.
Most times, these assumptions are made from our insecure minds, and they really do nothing to help us, instead, they make us feel more hurt, resentment, bitterness and hatred. Yet, we hold on to them as though they’re going to help us or make things be better than they were before.
For example, if a pastor gets some sign in his church that members of his congregation do not like him. Accordingly, he begins to form false opinions, make fallacious assumptions and look for the smallest evidence he can get to justify his petty claims.
As a result of this, he makes a big deal of the smallest things his church members do to him. He gets mad, finicky, fastidious and fussy over trivial matters, even though he’s a pastor, why? He’s making fallacious assumptions about the members of his congregation and that’s controlling how he reacts towards them.
“Well,” you might ask, “what if the pastor’s assumptions were actually very true?” The truth is, even if the pastor’s assumptions were true, (1) he shouldn’t care what others think of him—it’s none of his business, (2) he could choose to dialogue with his congregation, instead of musing over negative thoughts (3) it wouldn’t matter nothing in the world so far, he doesn’t focus on those negative thoughts. As we saw in part 3 and part 4, the worst thing in the world to do is to focus on the wrong, negative things people do to you.
On the contrary, he could choose to think what he likes; the kind of assumption that’ll benefit him: “Every member of my congregation likes me”; “every member of my congregations is my friend. It’s called the necessary assumption.
There are necessary assumptions and there are unnecessary assumptions. The necessary ones are those positive assumptions that benefit you and those around you. The unnecessary assumptions are those negative assumptions that hurt you and those around you.
You’d have to embrace the positive assumptions if you want to be a blessing to those around you. On the contrary, if you want to be a poison to those around you you can as well choose to embrace the negative assumptions–the choice is yours.